Listen to Lena

Perfecting the Art of Conversuasion

breastfeeding

Meet My BFF

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I never thought of myself as the type of woman to have a BFF. 

It’s quite obvious, actually; I covet my personal space, don’t mind being by myself for long periods of time and would much rather dance to the beat of my own drum. So the fact that I’ve been attached to the hip of my BFF for the last 18 months is somewhat puzzling to me – especially since it’s out of character for me to share so much with one individual.

Meet my BFF… my Breast Feeding Fanatic.

Reid will be 18 months old next week, and he’s still firmly attached to my boobies.

(That’s 1.5 years for those who don’t speak mom-ish; I know, we’re insufferable with our measurement of baby’s age by months, no?)

Please don’t assume I’m one of those women who believes exclusive breast milk is best until the child is 4 years old, because Reid does eat table food (he loves fruit and pasta) and drinks homo milk, juice and water. But, he also loves a good cuddle with mommy, and asks for breast milk about 10 times per day.

Of course, I don’t actually give in to his demands – allotting him only about 5 minutes at the breast a handful of times. But that doesn’t stop him from trying his luck; he normally gropes at my top whenever I’m too close for too long, and although Reid hasn’t mastered speech just yet, he can clearly articulate his desire for “Neh-Neh”. And sometimes I cave; it’s just the best way to calm him down from a tantrum, get him drowsy for a nap or keep him shushed while I talk on the telephone.

Trouble is, I’m not quite sure how to wean him. And I’m not quite certain I want to.

Truthfully, I’d love for him to sleep through the night without the expectation of a warm quickie to lull him back to sleep. And, I’d be even happier if I could be away for a day and not have rock-hard boobs by the end of it. But the simple fact is, I can’t imagine not pulling him onto my lap and bringing him in close; having his warm hand on my heart as he settles in to feed. I rather enjoy the one-on-one time with him, and feel the need to protect a bonding experience I’m not willing to give up just yet.

My continued relationship with my BFF is met with mixed reactions.

“Good for you. I breastfed my little one until she was two.”
“You know you need to stop, right? He’s old enough.”
“Are you still f%#king breast feeding???”
“That’s awesome. I plan on breast feeding for as long as possible.”

I’m not too concerned with what others say. Depending on my mood, I’ll wholeheartedly agree with them (“I know! I’m sick of it already! He needs to be weaned…”) or just shrug my shoulders and go about my day. I know that the decisions I make will be best for Reid and me, and it’s sometimes hard for onlookers – even friends and family – to appreciate that. But it’s not a big deal –

After all, nobody comes between a girl and her BFF.

5 Things I Learned About Breastfeeding

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Baby Reid is growing up!

As we just celebrated his first birthday, a popular topic of discussion at his party was, “So, are you done with breastfeeding?”

Technically – no. I still BF him morning and night, and any time in between when I’ve got a few moments and he’s craving boob (just like I crave chocolate, I bet). But when we’re on the go or I’ve got things to do, he’ll happily sip a straw cup filled with homo milk.

I can’t deny that weaning brings about a whole new sense of freedom, but old habits die hard and frankly I do miss the closeness. Which is why Reid is still 50% boobage… with me being at home, there’s really no rush to wean completely.

So I began thinking about my breastfeeding journey one year ago; my struggles, my hopes and finally, my success. Remember A Tale of Two Boobs? Seems like a lifetime ago, but after reading the posts, I’m filled with awe and satisfaction of how fine-tuned nature can be. Therefore, I decided to do a post on five things I’ve learned along the way.

1) Breast is best, but formula is fine, too. 

I’ve got two beautiful, healthy boys – one completely on formula, the other, 100% breast milk. I thought after I successfully breastfed that I would have an epiphany; that I would suddenly realize what all the hype was about. Well, I can’t deny that there are oodles of benefits of breastfeeding, but when it comes down to it, I felt no more love, satisfaction or peace than when I fed Ryder. Just as I spent hours connected to Reid, I spent the same time cuddling and holding Ryder close as I bottle fed him. So when it comes down to it, I think as long as you’re making a concerted effort to love, care for and nourish your child, after you’ve made your choice (hopefully an informed one), don’t beat yourself up over where that nourishment comes from.

2) Adhere to the “Two Week” rule.

When I first decided that I truly wanted to give breastfeeding my best, several mamas weighed in with advice. But a recurring token of wisdom was to simply hang in there for two weeks. Yes, it’s VERY uncomfortable. And your nipples will feel tender, sore, and will likely bleed. And it’s a b*tch if you’re trying for the first time following a c-section. BUT, take a short term approach. Tell yourself to hang in there, if only for two weeks. With Ryder, I quit after four days. I just couldn’t see myself going through any more pain or frustration. But had I just hung in there a little longer, who knows? With Reid, around the 4-5 day mark I once again found myself caving, but I was steadfast and held my ground. And just like most mamas predicted, after about 10 days, suddenly it hurt a LOT less, my nipples “toughened” up and stopped bleeding, and like magic, Reid got the hang of it.

So I’m now a HUGE fan of the two week rule. Of course, there are many instances in which no matter how long you persevere, breastfeeding is not for you (or your child). But in instances where your resolve is weaning purely based on pain and/or discomfort, hang in there. You’ll be amazed at how quickly things turn around.

3) The “latch” is a temporary phenomenon.

When you’re first introduced to breastfeeding, it’s all about baby’s latch. You’ll find written instructions, diagrams and even videos which will show you the preferred placement of baby’s mouth on nipple. And while it is vitally important in those early days to establish a correct latch, rest assured, after a month or two, you’ll no longer be so interested what baby is doing with his/her mouth. Because once a baby learns how to get what he needs, he’ll get it – lying down, upside down, you name it. In fact, Reid’s currently favourite position is with me lying on my back and him crouched over me with his butt in the air. It goes against everything I know about gravity, but hey, he’s drinking and he’s happy. The latch is only important in those early days – after that, baby’s instincts will take over.

4) A breast pump is a valuable tool.

Yes, I wrote a review and had a giveaway for a Medela Freestyle. But I just want to put it on record that I firmly stand behind both the product, company, and value of having a quality breast pump on hand. It’s particularly important in the first month, while establishing supply.

The Medela Freestyle helped me in the following ways:

a) In between BF’ing sessions, I pumped to stimulate my milk supply.
b) I sometimes topped off Reid after breast feeding with the pumped milk, so I was always certain he’d had enough to drink. Took a lot of the guesswork out, and saved me from supplementing with formula.
c) Pumping and storing allowed me to be away from Reid for short periods of time, and even gave me a break at night when hubby took over one feed.

Not sure if it was nature or all my efforts pumping to stimulate supply, but for the first 7-8 months I actually had an oversupply to the point of engorgement. But I’m not complaining!

5) The weight doesn’t always “fall off”.

It’s always amusing to read about celebrities’ theories on how they dropped the baby weight. “It’s definitely the breastfeeding” they always say. Oh sure. It has nothing to do with the personal trainers, team of nannies (who allow them to spend 5 hours a day in the gym), personal chefs or calorie-restricted diets. And it’s most definitely not that jaunt down to Brazil for a quick nip and tuck.

Now while it is a fact that breastfeeding burns up to 500 calories per day, technically, to maintain a healthy supply, it’s advised that lactating mothers increase their calorie intake by 300 calories. However, as most exclusively BF’ing mommies will tell you – you’re freaking STARVING all the time! So with a proposed deficit of 200 calories, the weight won’t necessarily fall off dramatically. BUT, breastfeeding will help you return to your pre-pregnancy shape more quickly, and with less intervention. It also helps if your body is in prime physical shape before you conceive – as any trainer will tell you, muscles have memory.

However, don’t be surprised if you hang on to an extra few pounds until you’ve started the weaning process – in the two weeks following Reid’s introduction to homo milk, I dropped 6 pounds without even trying. Turns out my body needed that extra fat to aid with the production of quality milk for my babe – a trade off I’m more than willing to oblige.

So there you have it – five things I didn’t know just one year ago, but am happy to share now. And to all the past, present and future breast feeders out there, my final tip post-lactation: invest in a quality push up bra!

LA VIE EN ROSE AIR PAD BRA
Any tips you’d like to share? Or war stories? Please, do tell!

A Tale of Two Boobs: Chapter 4

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Thought all that boobie talk was behind us? No way – I just had to start the new year with an update on my progress!

It’s no surprise that it was a very important goal of mine to breastfeed my son. Having chosen the formula route the first time, I wanted to do everything in my power to give breastfeeding my best effort. (Check out chronicles of my initial attempts – and success – here.)

Well, almost 8 months in, I’m happy to say that Reid is still a boob man: on 100% breastmilk and a happy, healthy baby. But it hasn’t been all smooth sailing.

Just over a month ago, three things happened simultaneously: Reid began solids, started to teethe profusely and stopped sleeping through the night. As a result, I was stressed out and incredibly over-tired – and within days, my breastmilk supply went from abundant to barely there. Previously, I was able to pump 3-4 ounces between feedings in under 10 minutes; you can imagine my surprise when barely 1/2 an ounce trickled through the pump after 15-20 minutes. I freaked out – did this mean my milk was drying up prematurely? Was Reid getting enough to eat? Was it time to wean to formula? His diapers, once heavy and soaked, became light and barely wet. Oh no.

So I pulled out the formula and mixed him a bottle. Coaxing him in my arms, I slowly brought the bottle to his mouth while I hummed a lullaby. He greedily took the nipple in his mouth (he is accustomed to drinking expressed breastmilk) but after just half a sip, pulled away and frowned at me in confusion.

“Go ahead,” I encouraged. “Try it, you may like it!” After one, two more sips, he angrily let out a growl. And within seconds, I witnessed a tantrum like no other. Swinging his head to and fro, crying, screaming – even batting the bottle away with his hands – he looked at me accusingly.

“What the hell’s wrong with your boob, woman?” he seemed to be demanding. Ugh.

I suspected I had waited too long to introduce formula – his window of being reasonable and accepting of manufactured milk had long since passed. Panicked, I worried about the best way to go about satisfying his needs. My breasts stilled seemed utterly deflated and I knew my supply would not meet his demand in the long run. What to do, what to do, what to do.

Then I remembered that help was available. Denise! I thought. I’ll see Denise! She was the sole person responsible for helping me succeed at breastfeeding in the first place, and, thankfully, most regional clinics do not set a limit on the time that you have to seek assistance. So I called Peel Public Health and sure enough, was able to bring my then 7-month old in for a visit.

Words cannot describe how happy I am that I followed up. First, I had the reassurance of seeing a qualified lactation consultant – someone who understands how breastfeeding evolves past the first couple of weeks. Second, I was able to ask as many questions as I wanted, and Denise did her absolute best to alleviate my concerns and provide an explanation for my “perceived” drop in supply. And finally, Reid was weighed and cuddled, and I was reassured that he was doing just fine.

Now I say “perceived” drop in supply because it turns out my body was just adjusting to Reid’s changing needs. Since he’s quite the solids enthusiast, he naturally had less need for breastmilk. His teething also curbed his appetite, and at 7 months, he seemed more interested in the outside world – again, making his feedings shorter and less frequent. So I simply increased my water intake, stopped stressing about my supply, and took naps whenever possible to catch up on sleep. And like magic – two weeks later, my supply is back up again to what it once was! You can bet I’ve been freezing all that excess milk – in fact, I put aside one 4 oz pack every day so I’ll be able to take longer breaks from him in the new year.

I suppose the moral of my story is that it is NEVER too late to seek breastfeeding support. If Reid had taken to formula, I may have weaned him early for fear that my supply was low or that I had dried up prematurely. The truth is, it was just a normal variation that was easily overcome. That is not to say that I won’t try to wean him onto formula again – breastfeeding must be enjoyed by both mother and baby to work, but for now, I’m happy to keep him on the boob and use expressed milk when necessary.

Eternal thanks once again to Peel Public Health, and, of course, Denise (I ♥ You!) – and to all the mamas out there, may your children (breast and/or bottle fed) enjoy a healthy and happy 2011!

Bebe au Lait Nursing Covers… Winner!

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Thanks to everyone who entered the Lena Loves… Bebe au Lait Nursing Covers giveaway. As a breastfeeding mama who’s a little shy about baring boobies in public, this stylish and ergonomic cover has been a lifesaver. In fact, I was involved in an episode of “Who Wore It Better?” last week, when another BF’ing mother pulled out her cover in the same Sevilla print!

As a reminder, up for grabs is a Bebe au Lait Nursing Cover in the fabric print of your choice.

And the winner is… Monica! Congratulations!


Please send me an e-mail with your complete contact details, so that I can have the prize sent to you right away. Thanks to everyone who participated, and to Bebe au Lait!

Lena Loves… Bebe au Lait Nursing Covers

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It’s no secret that I’m an avid breastfeeding mama, and have no problem discussing the ups and downs of my breastfeeding journey with anyone who cares to talk ta-tas.

Nursing in public? That’s another story. Heck, I didn’t even formula feed in public with Ryder, being too embarrassed to admit that I was giving my baby manufactured milk (crazy, I know, but postpartum guilt is an evil enabler). So it’s no surprise that I’m just a little reluctant to bare the boob for all to see, even thought I’m pleased as punch with my efforts and consequent success.

That’s why I love Bebe au Lait Nursing Covers. Made from 100% cotton in an array of fabulous prints, they allow for discreet, stylish nursing in public. Now Baby Reid can feed on demand in comfort, while keeping eye contact with mommy thanks to the cover’s unique rigid neckline.

I selected the nursing cover in Sevilla because I loved it’s fun, modern pattern. While I took a few pictures with the cover for the purpose of this review, I feel that breastfeeding is a very intimate transaction between baby and mom, and therefore decided against posting my personal photos. However, check out the fab design of the Sevilla cover:

And the amazing selection from which you can choose:

Here’s what makes Bebe au Lait Nursing Covers great:

– Patent protected, 100% Cotton
– Terrycloth pocket detail for quick cleanup and storage of breast pads or pacifiers
– Machine washable
– Unique rigid neckline allows for ventilation, as well as direct eye contact with the baby
– Generous sizing keeps mommy completely covered during breastfeeding
– Multi-use: can be used as a nursing cover and as a sunshade to protect baby’s fragile skin from harmful UV rays when in a baby carrier or car seat/stroller

Besides the rigid neckline, I LOVE the terrycloth pocket detailing. I store my breast pads in the little pockets, and when Baby Reid is finished, use the soft corners to give his mouth a quick little wipe. The nursing covers make breastfeeding in public a breeze, and for shy mamas such as myself, give us the confidence to nourish our baby with fashion and flair!

Click here to shop online at Bebe au Lait.Want to be stylish too? Enter for your chance to win!

One lucky Listen to Lena! reader will win a Bebe au Lait Nursing Cover in the fabric print of her choice. To enter, check out the designs, then leave a comment telling us which print you’d like to win.

You can also qualify for extra entries! Remember, you must leave a separate comment to claim your extra entry. You can:

(1) Follow my blog, Listen to Lena!
(2) Like Bebe au Lait on Facebook
(3) Follow Bebe au Lait on Twitter
(4) Tweet about this giveaway (here’s a tiny URL for you: http://tinyurl.com/2wk42lt)
(5) You may Tweet daily if you wish

I’ll draw for a winner at the end of September. Special thanks to Bebe au Lait, and good luck everybody!

It’s World Breastfeeding Week!

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From August 1st – 7th, 2010, the World Alliance for Breastfeeding Action (WABA), and breastfeeding advocates in more than 170 countries worldwide will be celebrating World Breastfeeding Week for the 19th year with the theme “Breastfeeding: Just 10 Steps. The Baby-Friendly Way”.

Research shows that the best feeding option globally is the initiation of breastfeeding within the first half hour of life, exclusive breastfeeding for a full six months and continued breastfeeding through the second year or beyond. Breastfeeding improves short and long term maternal and child health; and thus contribute to the attainment of the Millennium Development Goals (MDGs) 4: REDUCE CHILD MORTALITY and 5: IMPROVE MATERNAL HEALTH, to which many countries and agencies are committed.

UNICEF recently noted that the reduction of child deaths from 13 million globally in 1990 to 8.8 million in 2008 is partly due to the adoption of basic health interventions such as early and exclusive breastfeeding.

What are the Ten Steps to Successful Breastfeeding?

Every facility providing maternity services and care for newborn infants should:

1. Have a written breastfeeding policy that is communicated to all health care staff.
2. Train all health care staff in skills necessary to implement this policy.
3. Inform all pregnant mothers about the benefits and management of breastfeeding.
4. Help mothers initiate breastfeeding within a half-hour of birth.
5. Show mothers how to breastfeed, and how to maintain lactation even if they should be separated from their infants.
6. Give newborn infants only breast milk unless medically indicated.

7. Practice rooming-in – allow mothers and infants to remain together – 24 hours a day.
8. Encourage breastfeeding on demand.
9. Give no artificial teats or pacifiers to breastfeeding infants.
10. Foster the establishment of breastfeeding support groups and refer mothers to them
on discharge from the hospital or clinic.

Click here for more information on World Breastfeeding Week.

To celebrate, I’m giving away my favourite breastfeeding companion – the Medela Freestyle breast pump! Click here to read my review and enter the giveaway!

Lena Loves… Medela Freestyle

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If you’re breastfeeding, or thinking of breastfeeding (assuming you’re a mommy-to-be), chances are you’ve read up on the benefits of expressing milk. The common reasons women pump are to:

– Relieve engorgement when milk comes in
– Collect milk for feedings when working or away from home
– Increase or maintain the milk supply

– Prevent painful engorgement which can lead to mastitis
– Provide breast milk for a hospitalized or sick baby
– Stimulate relactation or induce lactation in an adoptive mother

Source: What to Expect the First Year

I hope you’ve been following my series A Tale of Two Boobs. If you’re a regular reader, you’ll know that I made it my mission to breastfeed with Reid after I gave up too easily with Ryder. And while I’ve been successfully breastfeeding for 73 days (yes, I counted), it hasn’t always been easy – and I’m sure 99% of breastfeeding moms will say the same thing.

But there are ways to make it more manageable. My holy trinity? Determination (check), seeking the right help early on (check) and a high quality breast pump (check). And I LOVE my breast pump.

I was very fortunate to receive the Medela Freestyle hands free breast pump for review. For those in the know, this is the Cadillac of breast pumps. The Freestyle is Medela’s first hands-free, double-electric pump.

Features include:

– Daily use · double pump · electric
– True pumping mobility with hands-free option
– Rechargeable battery and ultra-lightweight motor
– Easy interaction with digital display, memory, timer and backlight
– More milk in less time with 2-Phase Expression technology
– Everything mom needs in a convenient bag – perfect for active moms
– Double pumping kit features SoftFit breastshields for massaging comfort
– All parts that come into contact with breastmilk are BPA/DEHP Free

Click here to see all the goodies that are included with the Freestyle.

Before I left the hospital, nurses suggested that I get my hands on a hospital grade breast pump to help stimulate my milk flow. Their recommendation? The Medela Symphony, of course. Even though I knew I had the Freestyle at home, I took their advice because I didn’t want to do anything to derail my efforts. I rented the Symphony for a week and figured I would take it from there.

At the end of the week, I was hesitant to let it go. My breast milk had come in fast and furious, and I credit pumping sessions with the Symphony for increasing my supply. However, when I compared the features of the two pumps, I realized that the Freestyle was on a level playing field due to it’s 2-Phase Expression Technology and Maximum Comfort Vacuum. So I said goodbye to the Symphony, ready to start a close relationship with the Medela Freestyle.

All I can say is WOW. The Freestyle is without doubt the answer to my prayers. Comfortable, easy to use and an expert at drawing out breast milk, I discovered with glee that I could express four (4) ounces of milk in just under ten minutes. Why I love it:

1. After sterilizing all the parts, I literally skimmed the instructions once before I was able to start pumping. It’s really that simple. The LCD screen and settings are clear and well placed. The memory button allows me to save my favourite pumping pattern for ease and efficiency for the next pumping session.

2. The Medela Freestyle is beyond comfortable. The pumping action very closely resembles the baby’s natural sucking rhythm thanks to the 2-Phase Expression. Babies change the way they suckle at a mother’s breast during breastfeeding. Initially, they suck rapidly to stimulate the milk ejection reflex (MER) and induce milk “let-down”. This phase is referred to as “Stimulation”. Once the milk starts flowing, they settle into a more relaxed sucking speed. This phase is called “Expression”. Medela pioneered this technology with the Symphony, and now this innovation is available in the three further models – the Freestyle, Pump in Style Advanced and Swing.

3. The pump is a champion. With electric double pumping action, it literally takes me less time to express a 4 oz feed than it would take me to wash, sterilize and prepare a bottle using powdered formula. And there is nothing more satisfying than seeing those bottles fill up with nourishment manufactured by mommy!

4. It’s tiny. The breast pump unit honestly fits into every purse I own – and the palm of my hand. Perfect for working mommies, when travelling, or even at home (who wants to have a huge contraption in the corner of a room?) And while it’s not whisper quiet, you can definitely carry on a normal conversation, watch TV, or even have baby sleep next to you while pumping (I find the rhythmic sounds actually help to calm Reid).

5. The Medela Freestyle has helped keep me sane. I can now leave the house for a few hours, knowing that there will be breast milk on hand for Reid. And, for those times that he cluster feeds throughout the night, daddy can administer a feeding thanks to frozen and thawed breast milk that I’ve previously pumped (my freezer is stocked with a 2-3 day supply – particularly handy for emergencies or just in case of illness).

At $400 the breast pump is not inexpensive (Cadillacs never are). Here’s my advice – rent the Symphony while you determine if breastfeeding works for you. The Symphony is the only breast pump which allows multiple users – all other pumps (including the Freestyle) are single user only. Therefore if you purchase the Freestyle off the bat and don’t follow through, you could be out a chunk of change.

HOWEVER, if breastfeeding is a go and you plan on expressing milk on a frequent basis – you don’t have to think twice. The PTPA Award Winning Medela Freestyle is for you. It is 100% Lena-Approved! Click here to learn more about this revolutionary product.

I am so very lucky to have received this item for review – and I’m happy to share some of that luck with you!

August 1st through 7th happens to be World Breastfeeding Week, and to celebrate, I’m giving away a Medela Freestyle (value $400)!

Prize includes: Attractive tote bag, Hands-Free Kit, 2 bra adapters, 2 replacement bra adapters – universal, 2 replacement bra adapters – hook & eye, Support belt & extension, 2 – 24 mm SoftFit breastshields, Breastshield Spare Parts Kit, 2 breastshield bodies; 2 membranes; 2 back caps, 1 set of tubing, 4 – 5 oz breastmilk bottles, lids & travel cap, Wide base slow flow nipple, Rechargeable lithium-ion battery, Power cord & charger, Contoured ice pack, Removable cooler carrier, Instructions & quick start card, Breastfeeding Information Guide

Now Medela has graciously offered me the chance to sit down with one of their lactation consultants for a Q&A session, so to enter this giveaway you can:

Post a question about breastfeeding/pumping you’d like me to ask
-or-
Tell us why you’d like to win the Medela Freestyle

(I’ll random pick 10 questions to pose to the lactation consultant.)

You can also qualify for extra entries! Remember, you must leave a separate comment to claim your extra entry. Simply:

(1) Follow my blog, Listen to Lena!
(2) Offer your best breastfeeding and/or pumping tip
(3) Tweet about this giveaway (here’s a tiny URL for you: http://tinyurl.com/32bhfn3)

I’ll draw for a winner at the end of August. Special thanks to Medela, and good luck everyone!

A Tale of Two Boobs: Chapter 3

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Read previous chapters here.

It’s been a while since I posted – I won’t lie to you; it’s because I’ve been very busy… breastfeeding. I’m happy to say that Reid has been on 100% boobage for 58 days now, with the occasional bottle of pumped and stored breastmilk (more on my fabulous Medela Freestyle breast pump later).

Still, I want to tell my story, and so I’ll pick up where I left off…

… There was a knock on the door and Denise, a beautiful woman with a kind face, walked in.

Denise would be the third lactation consultant that I met with in three days. After not recalling my time with the first, and not sure I even understood the advice of the second, I decided to lay everything out on the line and verbally ambushed Denise the moment she sat down.

I talked about my past – my failed attempts at breastfeeding with Ryder. I spoke of my unrelenting guilt for much of his first year of life. I explained how desperate I was to give it my all this time around. And I cautioned her about my “problem” left boob; even relayed some of the techniques I had been shown by the other nurses. I talked and talked and talked.

Denise perched on the edge of my bed and listened intently, barely interrupting me as I let everything out. Finally, she said “Well, why don’t we just go ahead and get started.” I have to admit that after 2 days of pain and frustration, I had little hope this session would be different from the rest.

Now here is the one piece of advice I have for everyone trying their hand (boob?) at breastfeeding: It’s not about getting help, it’s about getting the right help. If things aren’t going well for you even after seeking assistance, keep persisting until you find someone who will break it down in a way that you can relate to. Don’t give up. Just 2 minutes into my consultation with Denise I could see that she not only knew her stuff (phew!) but she also recognized that breastfeeding requires cooperation from both mom and baby. She therefore took the time to explain to me the mechanics behind what Reid was after, and what I would have to do to satisfy his needs.

Specifically,

1. Most babies are born knowing how to lap up milk – like a tiny kitten, if you will. However, they do not necessarily know how position, latch and direct the flow of milk into their mouths – that’s up to mom. Recognizing that breastfeeding is work and isn’t always instinctive is critical to shaping your expectations.

2. Who says you can’t help baby along? I complained that Reid could not successfully latch on to my left breast, because the nipple was slightly larger and had a tougher texture than the right. Instead of suggesting I throw in the towel and simply pump the breast as other nurses had, she literally gave me a look as if to say, “So? That’s the best you’ve got for me? Smarten up sister.”

Denise then showed me how to slightly press down on Reid’s chin to elongate the position of his mouth on my nipple. VOILA! Instant, perfect latch. It was such a simple manoeuvre, I couldn’t believe that no one had thought to demonstrate it before. Position. Latch. Help Baby Along. WOWZERS.

Instantly I felt somewhat more confident – if I could actually re-position Reid’s latch on my breast, I could avoid the painful tugging I normally felt. I definitely felt a glimmer of hope, and gleefully pulled Reid off to position him again. Latch. Help Baby Along. It worked! I actually sat back to admire my handiwork, and took in the very precious sight of baby lapping away.

I’m not going to lie; it wasn’t exactly pain-free. BUT, it was indescribably better – so much better that for the first time in 72 hours, I actually felt that I may stick with breastfeeding and see it through. I immediately made a follow-up appointment with Denise, hoping to see her again in 3 days. I wanted Reid weighed, I wanted to re-evaluate my technique, and most of all, I wanted reassurance. Denise gave me a thumbs up; confident I would be able to succeed. I know this sounds weird, but I left the hospital that day hoping that I wouldn’t let her down.

And here’s my second piece of advice: follow up. In most cities in North America, you can find wonderful lactation consultants who are only too happy to help you along. Don’t feel that your visit in the hospital has to be your last – breastfeeding support is available in person, over the phone, and even online. With Ryder, I made the mistake of trying to figure it out all on my own, and abandoned my attempts too soon when I felt it wasn’t working. This time, I truly credit my success to staying on top of it, finding the right help, and following up.

Well, it turns out that just three days later, Reid had re-gained his birth weight and was thriving. I was learning how to get comfortable with him, and even though I had to clench my teeth when he latched (I don’t feel the need to do this anymore, thank goodness!) his actual time at the breast was enjoyable for both.

And here’s an open THANK YOU to Denise – you are quite honestly one of my favourite people in this whole world. I cannot begin to describe how meeting you has changed my life – and Reid’s, for that matter. You are very much appreciated.

Today, I’m happily breastfeeding and pumping like a champ! In the next chapter, I’d love to share my experience with the PTPA Award Winning Medela Freestyle – the breast pump which has allowed me to find balance in my life while continuing to provide breastmilk for Reid. Stay tuned for my review… and you just know that there may be a HOT giveaway involved (hint, hint!)

The Gong Show

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It’s 9:45pm and I’m just about to crash. Tonight, I’m praying that we don’t have another episode of The Gong Show.

(Gong Show – An event marred by confusion, ineptitude and shenanigans.)

Earlier today, in the wee hours of morning, Reid woke up at his usual 2:30am for a little drinkey.

(You should know: For the moment, Reid sleeps in our room. He normally has his last feed at 9:30pm and then gives me 5 wonderful hours before he hungers again. BUT, in the hours leading up to this feed, I normally engorge quite dramatically, as 5 hours of no action = mucho milk. Is there a purpose for this? Keep reading.)

As soon as Reid awoke, I changed him, fed him on the left breast and burped him, only to feel an explosion down below as I held him over my shoulder. Because men have it way too easy, I woke up Mike and asked him to change Reid while I quickly popped out for a pee.

As Mike was changing his diaper, he noticed that he had pooped right through and up his back. He hollered at me to bring a new sleeper. That’s when I realized that I had removed all the baby clothes from the dryer and placed the clothes basket in Ryder’s room to be folded (didn’t happen of course).

GONG!

Quietly, I opened Ryder’s door and proceeded to root in the basket for a sleeper. At this point, Ryder woke up and leaped off the bed, thinking it was morning.

“It’s not time to wake up, sweetheart, go back to sleep,” I pleaded.

Wonder of wonders, he was a good boy and obeyed. Phew.

(You should know: I wash Ryder and Reid’s clothing together, and I normally procrastinate on putting their clothes away until half the basket is empty. Then I’m only folding 50%, ha ha! I hate folding clothes.)

I crept into our bedroom to find Mike with a naked Reid sitting on his leg.

“Put his diaper on!” I cautioned, horrified.

“Oh yeah, I guess I can do that,” he responded in a confused voice. After all, it was 2:30am. No sooner than the words came out, PPPRRRSSHHHH! Poop all over Mike’s leg.

GONG!!

I quickly lunged for the wipes warmer and opened it up – only to notice that we’d run out of wipes. And where is our stash of wipes? In Ryder’s closet, of course.

GONG!!!

(You should know: Ryder’s room is kind of a transitory area – we’ve got the diapers and wipes in his closet, and Reid’s clothing is actually in the one of the dressers. It’s because it will eventually be Reid’s room and Ryder will be bumped down the hall, but for the moment, while Reid’s crib is in our room, we’ve set up Ryder’s toddler bed in the room next to us to keep him close while he transitions to the big boy bed. Did you get that? Even I’m confused.)

So I tiptoed back into Ryder’s room and opened his closet. When I turned around, he was standing behind me holding his blanket.

“Schwing!!!” he cried. (swing)

“It’s not time to go the park, sweetie,” I said. “We’ll play on the swings later, okay?” Then I walked with him to his bed and tucked him in. THANK GOD he was in a cooperative mood.

“WILL YOU HURRY UP! I’VE GOT A TRAIL OF CRAP ON MY LEG!” I heard Mike hiss from our bedroom.

I blew Ryder a kiss and backtracked out of his room as quietly as possible.

Back in the bedroom, I handed Mike the wipes and proceeded to throw Reid’s first sleeper and the change pad cover in the bathtub so I could hose down the poop with water. By this time, Reid was tired of all our shenanigans and began to cry for the right breast. So I grabbed him, pulled open my nightie, and PSSSSSSSS!!!! Remember when I said I was on a 5 hour milk engorgement? Well, I basically started spraying milk everywhere. His face. His hands. His damned sleeper. I fumbled in surprise as I tucked my boob back into my nightie (not quickly enough, I was all thumbs). Then I realized that I had soaked his new sleeper from the neck to the chest area.

GONG!!!!

I made Mike creep in Ryder’s room for yet another sleeper. Mike somehow managed to tuck and roll out of sight before Ryder could see him and jump out of bed. Small problem? In his rush to get back to us, he didn’t close Ryder’s door all the way. We proceeded to change Reid again, who was at this point highly irritated with his loser parents. I went to wash my hands because they were sticky from the milkspray, and when I returned, Ryder was standing in our doorway, wide awake and smiling.

GONG!!!!!

Mike put him to bed and I finally finished the feed. Now let’s all put our hands together and pray that we have an ounce of competency tonight.

A Tale of Two Boobs

By

Chapter 2. (Read Chapter 1 here.)

It’s now just over an hour after Reid’s birth and I’m still smarting from the after-effects of the drugs. A lactation consultant arrives to help me put Reid to the breast – but I am so loopy that I literally fall in and out of slumber as she instructs me. Since I still have no feeling from the waist down, Reid is laid on the bed alongside me and is literally pushed on to my breast.

“Does that feel alright?” the consultant asks. “Humph…” I breathe in response.

That is literally the only memory I have of the first lactation consultant I met with, and I was shocked to learn from Mike that she actually spent about an hour with me, talking and instructing me on feeding positions. So much for my quality time with an expert immediately after delivery…

“Couldn’t you guys tell I was out to lunch?” I demanded hours later, when the fog finally lifted. He raised his hands in defense and told me I actually looked quite coherent, other than falling asleep a few times while she was talking. Gee, that’s not a red flag at all (rolls eyes).

So at that point I was back at square one – I had one baby, two boobs, and absolutely no idea what to do. Nix that – I had an idea of what to do, just no plan on how to follow through without pain and frustration. I thought I’d wing it and brought Reid to my breast, only to pull him off after about 5 minutes. Ow. How can it feel like biting when he doesn’t have teeth?

New plan. Call a nurse every time I’m ready to feed to get help with the latch. So that’s what I did over the next 5-6 feeds: before I put Reid to my breast, I made sure a nurse was present to guide me into positioning, latching and holding the baby the correct way. Mike watched on and thought I was doing just great, but inside, I was reeling. Every nurse had a different technique – and the amount of conflicting advice I received was just staggering. Specifically:

1. Two nurses told me to “scoop” the baby onto the breast, while demonstrating something that looked more like a three-point turn. I can tell you this; the only thing I scoop is ice cream, thank you very much. Scooping did nothing to lesson the pain of latching and actually had me considering running out to Walmart for some formula. (To add insult to injury, I later learned that “scooping” was an outdated technique and proven to be ineffective at establishing a good latch.)

2. One nurse told me to create a “boobie burger.” I kid you not. She literally grabbed my breast and compressed it horizontally between her hands until it resembled a beef patty. Then she proceeded to let Reid take a bite. Um, FAIL.

3. Two others took one look at my left areola and cautioned it was a “problem” nipple. Slightly thicker and larger than the right (sorry if too much info), this was the very reason I quit breastfeeding with Ryder – I found it impossible to establish a firm, painless latch.

“What can I do?” I asked them helplessly.

“You may not be able to breastfeed on that breast,” they both replied. “Instead, you can try breastfeeding on the right only and pumping the milk out of the left.”

I wanted to cry.

Now it may seem like I’m slamming the nurses, but I’m not. I LOVED everything about my hospital stay; unfortunately, the reality is that you really need to see a qualified lactation consultant for the correct advice. The nursing staff, while helpful, all have their own ways of suggesting tips to make breastfeeding easier, but for a boobie novice such as myself, I really had to bring in the big guns.

I spent the rest of Saturday fumbling through a combination of techniques – the good news: Reid had a strong suck and seemed content with the amount of colostrum he was extracting. The bad news: I was still positioning him incorrectly and it hurt, hurt, HURT… especially on the left breast. I stayed up through the night and started to make excuses (the problem nipple strikes again; maybe I can supplement with formula and just give as much milk as possible; perhaps I was a fool to try this all over again). All I knew is that I wanted out.

How do women do it? How do friends, family, strangers, even those African women who breastfeed while harvesting wheat do it???

Sunday morning arrived, and with it came the promise of a new lactation consultant. The nurses informed me that “Denise” was in and would stop by my room within the hour. I sat in the corner with Reid on my lap, clearing my head of all the excuses I made the night before. I wanted this, and I wanted it bad. It had only been 48 hours, and I all but slapped myself, willing my mind to focus; to remember the guilt and frustration that I felt when I didn’t breastfeed Ryder. To start over and stick with it.

There was a knock on the door and Denise, a beautiful woman with a kind face, walked in. I didn’t know it then, but she would prove to be one of the most positive influences on my experience with breastfeeding.

To be continued…

A Tale of Two Boobs

By

Chapter One.

This is the first of a series of posts detailing my journey with breastfeeding. I can promise you two things – I will talk about my personal experience and I will go into detail. If that makes you uncomfortable, stop reading now! Just hit “Home” and scroll up or down until you find a lighter topic :)

So here’s the story. Three months before Reid was born, I began researching everything to do with breastfeeding. Lactation consultants. Latches. Feeding positions. Help. I was bound and determined to breastfeed my baby-to-be.

His big brother Ryder did not enjoy the same privilege. Through a combination of innocence and ignorance, I simply didn’t prepare myself for the total and selfless commitment associated with putting the baby to the boob. Sure, I paid attention in prenatal classes. But learning about BF’ing ahead of time is like watching a cooking show at 2 a.m. Everything looks simple until the raw beef is in front of you (wow, even I think that’s a strange metaphor). But I’m sure you know what I mean – it’s only when you’re actually in the situation that you either sink or swim.

Here’s my list of excuses:

1. I was discharged from the hospital just 24 hours after Ryder was born, so there I was- a first time mother, who had no idea how to hold a baby, let alone take care of one. I was showed all of 4 times how to put the baby to the breast, and while it looked so simple in the hospital with the nurse guiding the baby, at home on my own was a different story. It hurt. He broke off and fell asleep more often than not. I couldn’t successfully latch him on the left breast. It sucked.

2. Speaking of the left breast, it was the bane of my existence. With a slightly larger areola and thicker texture than the right, Ryder simply slid off every time I tried to have him latch. After several fruitless attempts, he would cry in frustration. Then I would cry – and proceed to dump him back on the right. My left breast became engorged to the point that I leaned to the left when I walked (well, not really, but you get the point).

3. Ryder was born with a cephalhematoma, which is essentially a bump on the noggin. Although it didn’t occur to us at the time, he must have had one hell of a headache. And as such, he was more interested in sleeping than nursing. Wouldn’t you want to sleep off a hangover? So Ryder continued to lose weight, and I began to panic. The formula was in my house, I could give it to him. I could nourish him. I could feed him. So I did. Bye bye breast milk.

So that’s why Ryder was breastfeed for a total of four days, and I went on to experience postpartum guilt and depression for at least four months after. I felt like I had failed my son, and myself. There were resources available to me; I could have made it work. But I chose the right route for me at the time in order to keep my own sanity and make sure my baby was nourished.

Looking back, sure, I could have done things differently, but I no longer beat myself up over the decisions I made. Ryder is a healthy, active little boy with a tough-as-nails immune system (who despite warnings, has only been sick ONCE in two years with ONE ear infection, BF’ing Nazis be damned) and he’ll grow up knowing that his mommy did her best with what she was given.

But that doesn’t mean I can’t start all over again.

This time around, I was prepared. I all but demanded to see a lactation consultant while I was in the operating room (at which the nurse laughed at me, telling me to wait until they handed me my baby). Once I was wheeled to my room to recover, I refused to put Reid to my breast without a nurse present, because I wanted feedback on positioning, technique, etc. In short, I wanted to succeed. Was it easier this time? Hell no.

To be continued…