My boys are only about a month shy of their 4th and 6th birthdays, so I’m a little surprised that it’s already time to have “the talk”.
Truthfully, I assumed I had at least a few more years. My sons are barely out of the toddler stages! I had convinced myself that the the dreaded conversation would take place sometime in the distant future, so I did little to prepare myself – I gave it little thought and importance. Let the parents of tweens worry about it, I thought, I’m still PVR’ing Disney Junior shows!
But it happened. It happened and I was caught off-guard; silently cursing the acceleration of childhood. And it happened at the most inopportune moment; I was flustered, disorganized and trying to accomplish about a thousand things at once, and there stood Ryder, hovering in my doorway. I could tell he wanted to ask me something, and I turned to him, my face dripping with annoyance and expectation. “What is it?” I snapped.
If I had known this would be the pivotal moment, the moment I had both feared and dreaded would come eventually (but not now!), I would have been better prepared. I would have had all my key points of love, nurturing and most of all, quiet authority and instruction, ready to dole out with calm, maternal intelligence. I would have called out to my husband, who, as the man of the family, would’ve been able to delve from his own experience.
Yet my perfect vision of “the talk” crumbled at my feet when out of mouth of my sweet, young and naive son, the dreaded words flowed: “Can we get a dog?” Unprepared, I blurted out an unintelligent, garbled response that only the most practiced ears would understand and interpret as no f*cking way.
So, my friends, the hour is upon us and it’s time to have the “No Dogs Talk”. As an aside, I blame my best friend for the premature timing of the discussion, as she recently acquired the most adorable puppy I’ve laid eyes on and I’ve been showing the boys his photos. So I suppose I’ve had a hand in this debacle after all, and now it’s time to set the record straight. I don’t know how long I’ll be able to stand firm – and that troubles me. In fact, my husband is fairly convinced I’ll eventually give in. But for the time being, I will only take care of two babies, dammit.
Do you have pets? Were you convinced by your children – or, as a child, did you convince your parents?
Oh dogs are so good for little boys, give in!
Ha! Candy is good for little boys too… but my kids can’t have Skittles for dinner! LOL!
hehehe! You’re done for when I bring him over :)
I’m putting a 2×4 across our door to keep you and your evil adorable puppy out.
Haha the lead up was hilarious! I didn’t have pets growing up although I wanted a dog badly. Did you have pets growing up?
I didn’t Victoria, that’s why I’m so resistant to the idea. My husband grew up with a pug and has been begging me for one since the day we met :)
Not having a pet had the opposite effect on me; that is, I have become completely, 100% committed to the idea of having a pet! Particularly after Google-ing images of pug-chihuahuas… which if you have not seen, you must see!
Honestly, I can see why you would resist the idea right now, particularly if you do feel like you already have your hands full (and it’s not hard to see why you would feel that way!!). Pets *can* be a great way for a kids to learn responsibility, but parents, not the kids themselves, are usually the best judge of whether kids are ready to commit to that tasks.
But still do Google pug chihuahua mixes.
Well, I did Google pug chihuahua mixes… and I can’t even stand the cuteness. OMG! I have to stay strong.
We had a family dog growing up It was great.(Champ)Heinz 57)
And before I had my children I had an Akita from Japan (very big dog 150 lbs)(Mac Arthur)
Then with my own family three kids we started with a stray cat best cat ever!!!(Phoundus)
Then came cat # 2(Gizmo)
and then cat # 3(Penlope)
Then I got another Akita!! :)(Ryu) I got him from homeless street kids at Bay and Front street downtown!!
This all being said my house is full of furry babies(and fur) and paw prints my kids are almost all grown up and the brunt of cleaning up and feeding and bathing and paying vet bills are all mine but so worth it !!!!
But…. if you dont have the pet gene in you don’t do it because this will become YOUR dog as the boys are in school and you will be the one walking and feeding and taking the dog to obdients lessons and cleaning up the acidents..
All my pets are recsue animals and I wouldn’t give them up for anything!! I hope this helps you.
Allie, I can’t believe how many fur babies you’ve had and have! That is wonderful. And yes, it does help tremendously – it helps me realize that I do not want to be the one walking and feeding and taking the dog to obedience lessons and cleaning up the accidents!!!
I’m thinking you should get just a small dog for the boys, it also teaches them responsibility, but on the other hand if your not home much and travel lots then it’s not a good idea to have a dog
That’s very true. We don’t do a ton of travelling but I can certainly see us doing more as the boys get older. Definitely something to consider.
We have 4 pets – 2 cats & 2 poodles! Good luck on this one, the only advice I can give is don’t give in until you are ready to look after it. No matter how many promises are made it is often Mom who is left looking after the dog.
Yes, that is EXACTLY what I think will happen… which is why I’m digging my heels in. For now.
We got a dog before children and it helped to prepare us for the responsibility of another life. Then we had two cats dropped off at our house and we took them in.
Thanks for the insight BobbiJo! I definitely agree that pets are a great way to learn responsibility,
We had goats, dogs, chickens, cats and various other animals when I was younger, but we lived in the country. There is no way I’d want an indoor pet. I’m open to an outdoor one if I don’t have to look after it. It doesn’t try to come in all the time, or make a mess of my lawn. So that pretty much means no.
Hahaha you had goats! That’s pretty epic.
Glad I am not the only one feeling this way! I’ve got a 6 and 4 year old as well and they’ve been begging…..but honestly I feel like I just got through cleaning up caca and I am not ready for anymore caca yet! :)
Hear hear! It feels like we just got our little guy toilet trained… I’m not ready to deal with that either!
I have a Lab and and chihuahua, we always have pets. come on mom get a dog get a dog get a dog everybody now!
Ha! I don’t usually fall to peer pressure :)
oh Miss Lena, it’s gonna happen lol
We convinced our parents, my children convinced me. In all scenerios, us kids sucked at the dog job, Mom & Dad ended up doing the taking care of it while we relished in the licks and lovings.
Those summer walks together with the dogs we’ve had over time were beautiful… what was not was cleaning up after 1 got worms… ewww
Stand firm. I wish I had, but like the brave Maternal Soldiers before you, I do believe our “NO’s” got shot down and we surrendered.
Ah… this is invaluable. I know how wonderful it would be to go on family walks. And I know the boys would cherish the licks and lovings. But everything else….
yes! always remember… everything else……
I will!!
We just got a kitten in August, my daughter wanted a dog but I said no way I’m picking up doo-doo! She loves the cat, and it ate a hair tie and I paid $1000 to have it removed, so apparently I love that darn cat too!
ACK! See, I feel like I would do the same… and that’s why I want to stay firm, because I don’t want to spend $1000 on something like that!
That was just too flipping funny !!! ROFL
I think I have recovered enough to type now.
I had rabbits and cats growing up as I lived on the 2nd floor apartment in the house my parents owned.
Pets are a good way to teach younger children about responsibility, but I do agree with some of the other readers that it is usually mom (or dad) that end up doing most of the work.
You also need to think about your current lifestyle – like when you travel – who would look after the dog if you aren’t able to take it with you ? Are you prepared for all the added costs (“fixing”, annual shots, food, toys, license etc) ? Are you prepared for all the extra vacuuming and dusting (pet hair), and floor washing (rainy/snowy days) that will come with a dog ? Are you prepared for the possible chewing of furniture or shoes or “kids toys that accidentally got left out” ?
Yep, I’ve been through all that (well, my daughter experienced the chewing of the kids toys with her dog not me) so I thought it would only be fair to warn you ;)
I am soooo grateful for this! No, I am not prepared for ANY of the occurrences you listed above. I’m not saying I’ll never be…. but I’m not ready now. Thank you Flora!!
This made me laugh and laugh. It’s something I struggle with daily and yet I know that we can’t. It’s not fair to the dog. We’re just too busy…. But then theirs @MommasGoneCity and this http://hopeshared.com/22-photos-that-prove-babies-need-pets-number-17-especially/. #killmenow
OMG Nadia… OMG. That was…. sigh.
I didn’t have pets growing up, my parents wouldn’t let me. Now I have two dogs and five cats. And I tell everyone I’m making up for the fact that my parents wouldn’t let me have a pet growing up. :)
Interesting! I don’t know if having pets growing up would have made a difference… I just know that I’m not ready to take on the responsibility just yet…
I’m standing firm and we still have no pets. But, I did tell my son that when he’s older and shows me he’s responsible (his iPod is missing right now) we would consider getting one for him. I’m just hoping he gives up on the idea, or really if he does become responsible before he moves out, then I’ll be shocked and he really would deserve a pet :)
“If he becomes responsible before he moves out”… that had me chuckling!!
Hahaha! Thanks for the laugh :)
My advice? Take the boys to a local animal shelter (with clear intentions that this is a VISIT ONLY) to PLAY with the animals if they are really intent on having a pet.. They can still bond a little with the animals, but no commitment to you :)
That is a pretty wonderful idea Soozle! I may just have to look into that :)
Pets often just happen. Once they’re in your life, you just know it’s meant to be. They’re responsible for so many smiles. I’m a proud “crazy” cat mommy of 7. Most rescues I never planned.
That is so wonderful, I had no idea you had 7 cats!
I can hardly believe it myself lol. Our newest cat was a stray that someone shot in the head. This cold winter was our first excuse for letting him in, but…we fell in love…again.
My hubby and I never intended to have ANY pets. At all. None. We now have a cat, two birds, and turtles. All are rescues. The cat was found in our apartment hallway as a kitten abandoned. Someone knocked on our door asking if it was ours. The cat rubbed up on my legs, and then 15 minutes later I was off to the store to buy pet supplies while my husband kept it company in the house.
I bought my a bird, she had been asking for one for months. Then she decided she didnt want it and gave it back. We found an unwanted bird on kijiji as a companion for the first bird.
The turtles were going to be buried in the dirt in the back of an apartment building since a tenant was moving. My husband said he’d take them instead.
We’re bleeding hearts I guess. Never planned to have a pet. Ended up with 5.
Jaime, thank you so much for sharing your experience. The world needs more kind hearts! Such a sweet thing to read.
nope, never had any pets (except for fish in an aquarium) and never intend to due to family allergies.
I had aquarium fish too! But my dad ended up taking care of them after a few months, LOL!
omg that photo might be THE cutest thing I’ve ever seen …
What a sweet face!!!
I know… its hard to say no, isn’t it?
No dog as of yet but great read!
Thanks Darrah!
dog hair is a condiment in our house lol
Um… I think that’s exactly what I want to avoid, Chandra!!
Haha, I wish you luck standing your ground! I definitely understand though. Dogs are a lot of responsibility, especially when you don’t have a lot of time to commit.
That’s it exactly. I can’t even find time to clean my bathroom sink.. let alone take care of another mammal!!
HaHa! My eight year old has been begging for a pet especially now that her two friends on our street got the most adorable pups and friends of ours just brought their cutest puppy to our home recently. My answer is, your little sister is your pet, that’s why we had her, go play with her. (I was given the evil eye)
Oh gosh how I LOVE that! And considering Reid looks like a pug, I wonder what Ryder’s reaction would be to that??
We’ll see…. I can hold out for pretty long if I need to!
It’s tricky…. so far we can get away with it because of our allergies and his young age.
That’s good – hopefully you can get away with it as he grows too!
I understand your reluctance because dogs are a lot of work but they are so rewarding too. I have cats because they are less demanding! :)
That may be an option!
I have 2 cats and a dog, I’m allergic to them all, but mainly to the cats. My son brought a cat home from school, it’s feet were frozen white, and it was starving and had been abused. you couldn’t touch it from the waist to butt, it would scream in pain. One of his buddies was supposed to take it. Yeah, right!
Well it nurtured along, and loved going outside. It started getting chubby, and we just thought that it was doing well. Not!
Little did I know cats are very promiscuous, and well we had some kittens. Got 3 of them given away, but my other son wanted a pet of his own, yep you heard me right. We ended up keeping one of them. Thank goodness for allergy meds. But I do loved all my pets dearly!
Yes, I talked my parents into pets when I was little, we always had a dog, and really I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way!
Thank you so much for sharing your story Debbie! I can tell from your avatar that you are a pet lover!
I lmao when I read ‘no f*ckng way’ How can you say no to a dog?
Hahaha apparently I can – and did!
Too funny and I can totally relate as I am not a fan of scooping the poop and with every dog comes a lot of that task. So we have a cat and he entertains himself often hugged and squeezed by our boys but he lets them know when the limit is reached. Thanks for the story!
Well, that was definitely not ‘the talk’ I was imagining, but only when they are able to help care for the dog and show that they will be able to keep doing that.
I don’t know what I’ll do when this comes up, I’m really truly torn. I want one for our family but without any of the responsibilities. Let’s make a robot puppy :)
I believe every child should have a pet growing up,you would be surprised how much they learn .Animals are amazing.
If as a parent you are not ready for a pet you should never get one because the kids want one because they come with many responsibilities and it would not be fair to the pet.
Did you ever get a pet ?