I’ve got two very different little boys. Ying and yang, I like to call them. Because even though they’re both Tauruses, share physical characteristics and have an intense dislike for the bad “b” word – bedtime – they really couldn’t be more dissimilar. Which I suppose is half the joy of raising more than one child; the varying array of quirks, conflicts and complex personalities that keep you on your toes. (And often, reaching for a bottle of wine.)
This year, with Reid being in school for the very first time (translation: freedom!) I’m once again reminded that he is very different from his older brother. Whereas Ryder will ALWAYS finish his entire lunch at school, Reid has an insurmountable decision-making process, known only to him, for what he will eat, and what will go untouched.
“Why didn’t you eat your sandwich?”
“It was too melty.”
“Why didn’t you finish your grapes?”
“They’re too round. I like them less round.”
“Why did you bring back your cookies?”
“They smell funny. Like someone has been breathing on them.”
Now I ask you, what does melty even mean?? And how does it relate to a pristine turkey sandwich?
Two weeks in, I was seriously beginning to wonder if he would ever get the hang of eating a school lunch. And then I remembered a key piece of armour – a strategic tactic, if you will – in the war against determined toddlers: The Bribe.
Please don’t look for The Bribe in parenting manuals. We are stoically told from the moment our children are born that thou shalt not bribe children to elicit a desired behaviour or outcome. To which I say, yeah, and my toddler was toilet trained in 3 days when I bribed him with a KINDER SURPRISE.
So, I did what any responsible parent would do: I told Reid that if he finished his lunch… within reason, of course… he would receive a KINDER SURPRISE as an after school treat. The first day, he attempted to call my bluff; returning with an almost full, untouched lunchbox. However, when I doled out one of those delicious chocolate eggs to his brother, and not him, he quickly revised his stance.
The next day, the lunchbox returned empty, with a note from his teacher that the meal was indeed ingested by a reward-seeking little boy.
I’m not afraid to admit that I use “treats”, “rewards”, “bribes” – you name it – to encourage a certain behaviour from my children. And I can feel good about rewarding them with KINDER SURPRISE – a milky, chocolaty treat with the iconic small toy that provides hours (often, days) of creative play.
(PSST! In stores for a very limited time this fall – Transformers and Disney Fairies KINDER SURPRISE eggs! There are 8 Transformers toys and 10 Disney Fairies toys available in specially marked packages. Collect them all!)
Tell Me: Do you offer your children incentives for good behaviour?
I’m a #KinderMom who is part of the KINDER® Canada influencer team; as part of my affiliation with KINDER® Canada, I am provided with special perks and products. All opinions are my own.
They should be on good behaviour at all times so rarely offer incentives
Interesting! But how do you distinguish “should be on good behaviour” from “are well behaved”?
My nephew is doing the same thing…I’ll have to pass this along…
For sure. Reid and Kai are so similar, eh?
My daughter is an extremely picky eater, and won’t eat any of the healthy stuff in her lunch. I would definitely bribe her with a treat if she ate all of her lunch, however, I don’t trust that she won’t throw the healthy stuff away at school, and let on that she ate it.
Oh no, she’s a crafty one! Hopefully she turns around soon…
Reid’s comments crack me up, especially the one — “They smell funny. Like someone has been breathing on them.” Sounds like you have a little chef in the making with his keen olfactory sense.
Although the blog is about kids, even as adults incentives can be/are used to arrive at a desired behaviour. As long as the incentive does not hurt themselves or others, it’s all good.
I completely agree AC…. nothing wrong with a little reward, even for adults!
Love the answers from Reid LOL They all made me giggle.
I don’t think I ever had to use “bribes” with my daughter when she was growing up… she helped decide what was going in her lunch box every day so always ate it – then when she got older she would make it herself. ;)
That’s the best way, Flora! You are blessed!
I agree with Flora! Reid’s responses made me giggle! I think incentives are the way to go especially when the kids are young! P.S. We love Kinder Surprises! Such a fun treat!
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with incentives! And glad to hear you love Kinder!
I have not given my kids rewards for eating their lunch but I should. I have the same problem with my daughter, she eats like a bird.
Try it BobbiJo… it may just inspire the behaviour you are looking for!
I don’t necessarily use incentives but I also don’t hesitate to offer rewards like Kinder eggs to reinforce good behaviour.
That sounds wonderful Heidi – way to go!
Haha milk that Kinder Surprise for as long as you can! It’s working really well for you right now!
YES! I won’t give it up!
id buy them for the kids but lets face it id eat them
Hahaha I love this :)
My boys love Kinder Surprise! I do bribe my older son sometimes.
Sometimes, it just has to be done!
Hey you gotta do whatever it takes! Thank goodness for treats ;)
Heck yeah! Completely agree!
well guilty mom here I do bribe my kids treats to finish there meals, well at least a good portion of it, my children are very picky eaters and if I didn’t bribe them they probably starve themselves.
ha! I feel the same way sometimes :)
In general I’m more of the punish the bad than reward the good. But getting dessert or chocolate after a meal is contingent on cleaning his plate. Future eating disorder? I don’t know…. :(
I don’t think so at all – stuff our moms have done for generations :)
When they do good i make sure they know by a pat on the back depending on age or a hug,treat…..
Fussy eaters are hard to please,my grandson is very picky and eats mostly veggies which is a good thing right….NO..he needs so much more to grow into a strong young man.
These kinder eggs have been around for a long time and I remember getting them for my nephews and of course they loved them but I had no idea that they’re illegal in the US.