Years ago, as I rode the morning train into the city for university classes, I befriended another rider who shared the same stop. Often, we chatted about inconsequential things such as the weather and music – always scraping the surface, but never getting truly personal. She was a kind, witty woman; in her mid-twenties, she was already working downtown as a litigation assistant.
Months passed and we took to sitting together whenever we spotted each other in line. Since I only had morning classes three times per week, I saw her on and off throughout the semester. Then, weeks went by and I didn’t see her at all. Reasoning that she had probably changed jobs (or careers – she often talked about branching out in her field), I thought about how lonely the ride seemed with no one to talk to.
One morning, she once again appeared at my stop. I smiled broadly and approached quickly, taking long strides to meet up with her. As she turned, I instantly pulled back. She had lost weight; her eyes were rimmed with dark circles and her usually immaculately made up face was makeup-free and sallow.
I hesitated; I knew something was terribly wrong, but I’ve never been particularly forward about soliciting bad news. So I smiled tentatively and told her it was good to see her again. Grinning back at me, we boarded the train and settled into our seats.
“My mom is fighting cancer,” she announced with no preamble whatsoever.
I looked at this woman whom I had chatted with for months, and didn’t know what to say. So I simply put my hand over hers, and whispered – “I hope she wins.”
“There is always hope,” she replied with a smile.
The train arrived at the station, we said goodbye and parted ways. And, I never saw her again.
For weeks I scanned the obituaries for any mention of her family name. I looked for her every morning until the end of the school term, but she never reappeared at the train stop. There is always hope, she had said. In that moment, I prayed that her hope had given her strength. And that she knew I was thinking about her.
This holiday season, I’m remembering my morning commuter with The Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Doves of Hope Campaign.
Doves of Hope show patients that they aren’t alone in their fight to conquer cancer. The Doves are completely free to create, and knowing that other people are fighting with them gives patients and their families tremendous hope during their journey with cancer.
When you dedicate a Dove of Hope to a loved one, it will be displayed online in The Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation’s Dove Gallery. Your friends and family will be able to search for it and read the message you left. Doves of Hope are also displayed in the atrium of Princess Margaret Cancer Centre, where patients, their caregivers and family, and all of The Princess Margaret Staff can read the heartfelt messages.
In the past 10 years, over 55,000 Doves of Hope have been dedicated to people touched by cancer. Patients, survivors, caregivers and family members have been given hope by these doves. Volunteers, medical professionals and researchers working to conquer cancer in our lifetime have been inspired to push on during trying times. This year, they hope to have 11,000 Doves of Hope dedicated to loved ones.
This Christmas, please take a few moments to dedicate a Dove of Hope to a loved one. There is no charge for creating and dedicating a Dove, and you’ll help provide strength and inspiration to those who need it most. And, if you are able to make a small donation, the hope that Dove represents is amplified. Doves of Hope donations are used to support the life-saving, cancer-conquering work at The Princess Margaret Hospital.
Dedicate a Dove to a loved one today, and give hope to patients this holiday season.
The opinions on this blog are my own.
this gave me an ache in my heart… I really hope she won. I hope everyone wins..
Me too Candi. I still think about her a lot.
What a touching story as I go through this journey with my dad right now and it tears you apart!
Doris, sending hope and strength to you. xoxo
brought tears to me eyes.
:) Thank you. Please dedicate a Dove of Hope! It’s free and only takes a few minutes.
OMG when the tears stop blurring my vision I want to say I hope she wins the battle and war too! Love that you have a forum to share this with others. Hope that some way some how she see this and knows she was not alone.
Me too, Cathy. It’s my secret wish that she somehow stumbles on this post.
You have written a lovely post, Lena. It has made me quite emotional. I am praying for the famiies of those touched by the senseless shooting that has claimed so many innocent children. A lot of news around the world is so sad and so close to Christmas, it is heartbreaking. I often think that the people we see everyday, strangers to us, have lives too…we don’t know what they are dealing with. Between my Mum, daughter and me just in the last 2 weeks…I believe that there is someone else much worse off than I somewhere in the world.
Teresa, I completely agree with you. “I believe that there is someone else much worse off than I somewhere in the world”- I’d love for you to read my post “Someone, Somewhere”:
http://listen2lena.wpengine.com/2011/08/someone-somewhere.html
Tight hugs to you xoxo
That was really beautiful. Made me kinda teary. I hope she won :)
Thanks Sandra, I hope so too.
Wow! This brought tears to my eyes! Thank you for sharing such a touching story.
While struggling through a difficult season in life, I remarked to someone that hope is the most beautiful but dangerous thing you can give to someone – but yes, there is ALWAYS hope! Sometimes it is difficult to forget that in times of sorrow.
It’s true, Suzanne – sometimes hope is a dangerous thing. But often, it’s what brings people through even the toughest of circumstances. xo
Such a beautiful story. Thanks for sharing!
You’re welcome Sophia!
crying at work, thanks Lena!
I don’t want you to cry Dawn! Just send a Dove of Hope to someone who needs it this Christmas :) xo
Absolutely there’s always hope – my DD’s teacher was just diagnosed, there isn’t anyone who hasn’t been touched by cancer. What a wonderful campaign.
It really is, Sharlene. Keeping your DD’s teacher in my thoughts and prayers, along with all others who have been affected by this devastating disease.
2 1/2 years ago, 2 high school friends died from cancer. Last spring my FIL lost his long battle. 6 months ago my childhood church friend died from brain cancer – age 48. Just before Christmas my daughter found out her FIL (only 55) has been diagnosed with lung and bone cancer………….Im getting to the point where Im just bidding time until the next friend or family is struck. :(
I am so sorry for your losses, Lisa. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.