I know what you’re thinking – he’s only 2.5 years old! Well, it’s official – Ryder can read. Yes, he IS a genius. And I know this because:
He presses CANCEL on the dishwasher while in mid-cycle.
He hits EJECT on the DVD player while we’re watching a movie.
He selects BROIL on the oven when I’m baking a soufflé.
He has dialed 911 at least once.
He kicks every box labelled FRAGILE.
He rips apart papers with the words PAY TO THE ORDER OF.
He mouses over to the X button while I’m in the middl…………
(Okay I’m back.)
He presses the PANIC key on our car remote.
He throws away receipts marked GIFT.
You see, I refuse to believe he’s just a random sh*t disturber. NO WAY. He’s reading all right; selectively choosing ways to weave terror into my life. He has a beautiful mind.